第二高票中选为巫统副主席的教育部长希山在巫统大会说，巫统是我国独立功臣，将会在历史教科书突显这点。希山，你错矣！因为马来人，华裔和印裔都有分争取独立，历史讲求史实而不可被政治化的。即使希山后来声称媒体误解他的言论，他并没有抹杀其他种族的功劳，此澄清就让国人去判断是否错在媒体好了。首相阿都拉也说各种族都有功劳。无论如何，我们必须正视老师教科书的一些争议。
我在1960、70年代初读中学，当时的是英中，还未改制为国中。我们的中学历史教科书还延续英殖民政府的教育制度，对于国内外的历史资料不敢有所偏袒。我还记得我国独立历史都把三大种族的功劳记上，它们讲述关于主要宗教也以各自教义为依据。
不过目前教育部在宗教历史的偏颇现象，必须予以纠正。目前高中历史过于政治化，并且只偏袒单一种族的宗教－回教。新课本只用大约100个字谈儒家，用大约153个字谈道教，旧课本分別用大约330个字谈儒家，用220个字谈道教。新课本完全不提基督教，不过有提到兴都教和佛教。我认为学习宗教是一科专门科目，无需在国中大篇幅地教导，这应该是让有兴趣的学生上大专后自选的科目。我们无须过分详尽强调单一宗教而轻描其他的。几十年前我们的编写平衡，带来种族能够融合相处，那时大家能够坐在同一桌吃东西而不感到顾忌。但现在这种情况越来越罕见了，种族隔阂越发严重。
教育部也须确保老师不会因着偏见避而不谈某些题目。因为过去曾有老师因偏见而告诉学生“耶稣没被钉死而是逃走”的谬误。以前我的历史老师对于他自己有兴趣的题目，会用超出课程纲要的时间讲到口沫横飞的。然而有些题目则大略带过，甚至只字不提，叫学生自己回家修读。这样，再准确的历史，也会因着这样的老师因素，传达扭曲的非史实给学生。教育部须正视这现象。
我国的另外弱点是在高中分开文科和理科，后者的学生没有历史科。如此，即使我国的历史教科书编写得多么完整，竟然有一大群的学子因读理科而错过认识国家历史。这说明为什么有些国人对我国先祖的奋斗史一窍不通，那么不知教育部对此有何对策呢？
我也认为我国不妨在高中历史科增加国家宪法的内容。西方之所以变得民主，其中一个因素乃宪法是中学必修读的课程。我国已经独立51年了，但多少人对国家宪法认知？向来国人都被动地接受政客违反宪法的言论而被摆布，利益受到剥削。我们不能勇于表达自己的意见来维护自己的权益，因为我们对宪法无知。大马人要在国际有所突破，修读宪法正是此时矣。虽然我们不因此成为宪法专家，但却可以懂得自己的权益而争取公正和公义。
未来无论谁出任教育部长，希望他确保担任撰写和审核历史教科书的人员，必须包括各大种族以及各宗教信仰者。历史是记载史实，我们的先祖无论做对做错，后人必须坦诚面对。我们若把历史政治化，想设法美化它们的话，那么即等于栽培一群软骨的后人。因为历史就是国家的骨干，没有了骨干，人民怎样站得直面对世界？
Monday, March 30, 2009
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
性短讯的祸害
一幅有趣的摄像或摄影或调情的短讯在手机荧屏上似乎无伤大雅，但你知否你的少年儿女在发送一则信息时是在说什么吗？不错，许多父母掉以轻心，不晓得孩子掉进色情的河里正被冲向漩涡而去。
人海万花筒，人心比万物诡诈，吃了一大把年纪，头一次听到这个新字眼――
Sexting。它就是“Sex”＋“texting”，中文翻译为“性短讯”。少年男女藉着手机进行性爱，发送调情的信息。严重者还相约，结果发送性行为。
虽然其中不少并不带来一宗肉体的行为，但它却可在情感上混淆少年人。他们在经历性爱，但倘若他们认识爱的真谛的话，就不会走入歧途摧毁自尊心。发送性短讯的少年人或许没有机会与大人谈论他们的感觉，因为性短讯的其中之一的要求是向父母隐藏他们的举止。
隐私是部分要求，然而少年人不晓得他们的短讯和摄像是那么容易被转发出去给不必要的人。一些收到的男生可能会把它们上载到互联网上，甚至利用它们向她们勒索！结果导致一些女生受害人自杀的新闻时有所闻。
据报道，美国的性短讯越来越严重而使父母和教育工作者烦恼。美国的性道德每况愈下乃冰冻三尺，非一日之寒也！美国已经多年从小学阶段开始性教育，为什么那般努力不能帮助学生获得正确性观念呢？很简单，因为它们的性教育内容从一开始就错误了。它们教导学生“安全性行为”。所谓安全就是“可以有性爱，但要做足防范，只要不被传染性病就好了！”
这般的性教育，导致学生从年幼开始就充满好奇心。其实，呼吁安全性行为也是许多国家领袖用来打击爱滋病的惯用手法，但为什么爱滋病不减反升呢？因为只要在婚姻以外的滥交就有风险！正确的性教育乃是按照上帝的“只在婚姻里的性生活”准则。因此笔者认同最近天主教教宗表明“使用避孕套并不能打击爱滋病”的言论。
性短讯是不当的性教育所诞生之畸形怪婴，将会是21世纪滥用科技所带来的社会祸害。美国初尝禁果的年龄越来越年轻化，不过亚洲国家别以为这是西方国家的状况，其实火已经燃烧到这里了。笔者刚从中国回来，在那里读到中国年轻人正广泛追逐裸露服装时尚，令笔者感叹中国经济起飞后，真的引致饱暖思淫欲矣！
在科技发达的今天，父母若能关心孩子的处境是很迫切的，最起码需要知道他们互通短讯的人士是何许人，以及向他们解释有关负责任的行为对他们何等重要。
人海万花筒，人心比万物诡诈，吃了一大把年纪，头一次听到这个新字眼――
Sexting。它就是“Sex”＋“texting”，中文翻译为“性短讯”。少年男女藉着手机进行性爱，发送调情的信息。严重者还相约，结果发送性行为。
虽然其中不少并不带来一宗肉体的行为，但它却可在情感上混淆少年人。他们在经历性爱，但倘若他们认识爱的真谛的话，就不会走入歧途摧毁自尊心。发送性短讯的少年人或许没有机会与大人谈论他们的感觉，因为性短讯的其中之一的要求是向父母隐藏他们的举止。
隐私是部分要求，然而少年人不晓得他们的短讯和摄像是那么容易被转发出去给不必要的人。一些收到的男生可能会把它们上载到互联网上，甚至利用它们向她们勒索！结果导致一些女生受害人自杀的新闻时有所闻。
据报道，美国的性短讯越来越严重而使父母和教育工作者烦恼。美国的性道德每况愈下乃冰冻三尺，非一日之寒也！美国已经多年从小学阶段开始性教育，为什么那般努力不能帮助学生获得正确性观念呢？很简单，因为它们的性教育内容从一开始就错误了。它们教导学生“安全性行为”。所谓安全就是“可以有性爱，但要做足防范，只要不被传染性病就好了！”
这般的性教育，导致学生从年幼开始就充满好奇心。其实，呼吁安全性行为也是许多国家领袖用来打击爱滋病的惯用手法，但为什么爱滋病不减反升呢？因为只要在婚姻以外的滥交就有风险！正确的性教育乃是按照上帝的“只在婚姻里的性生活”准则。因此笔者认同最近天主教教宗表明“使用避孕套并不能打击爱滋病”的言论。
性短讯是不当的性教育所诞生之畸形怪婴，将会是21世纪滥用科技所带来的社会祸害。美国初尝禁果的年龄越来越年轻化，不过亚洲国家别以为这是西方国家的状况，其实火已经燃烧到这里了。笔者刚从中国回来，在那里读到中国年轻人正广泛追逐裸露服装时尚，令笔者感叹中国经济起飞后，真的引致饱暖思淫欲矣！
在科技发达的今天，父母若能关心孩子的处境是很迫切的，最起码需要知道他们互通短讯的人士是何许人，以及向他们解释有关负责任的行为对他们何等重要。
时代进步，言论退步
前苏联时期，有一则揶揄它打压言论的笑话――在一间美国课室里，老师告诉小学生苏联全国只有政府的独家电视台，有两个频道。学生马上“哗”的一声惊叹起来，认为一个共产国家还会提供两个频道这么多给人民消遣，还算不错。老师继续说，第一频道只讲共产党的讯息，你若感到沉闷的话，大可转台。转台后，荧屏上即出现一个凶神恶煞的共产头目指着你咆哮：“快给我转回第一台去！
共产主义国家的一言堂言论模式，导致人民贫困，生活缺乏素质。共产主义崩溃后，脱离的国家开始迈向民主及开放言论。不过，一个国家的进步，并不仅以经济和物资来衡量，还须看它的政府能够容许多大的言论空间。
马来西亚是一个自由世界的国家，但并不等于我们就能够享受很大自由。我们独立了51年，原本人民以为随着时代的进展，国家会变得越来越民主和言论会逐日获得进一步开放。可是事与愿违，我们可要失望了！这次内政部竟然吊销在野党的党报，即回教党的《哈拉卡》和公正党的《公正之声》。除此，行动党中文《火箭报》也面临准证不被内政部更新的问题。
其实从去年308大选的成绩，人民已经向国阵政府传达一个信息，即人民希望看到一个自由民主公平的国家出现，他们要摒弃一党独大的独裁政治环境。从这次吊销异议媒体的行动，可见巫统并没有捉到该信息。巫统仍然当家，这次事件在采取行动之前是否也获得成员党的认同吗？
吊销这些党报的行动，使到各平面和电子媒体增加重担。编辑们如履薄冰，在一个欠缺新闻自由的环境里，不少作者的文章被割爱并非他们写得滥，而是讲出事实。国家领袖被选民委托执政，不是要他们高坐在人民头上，而是服侍人民。要作明智爱民的政府就要听真话，而真话是从开放言论得来的。真话（忠言）逆耳，这是千古不变的道理。执政者行得好，自然能够无愧面对批判。
根据去年美国“自由之家”的数据，大马新闻自由排名第141位。全球总共有224个国家，194个属主权国家，加入联合国的有191个。若以191个联合国成员国来比较，第141位排名乃令人担忧的。我国经历了前首相马哈迪的独裁统治，人民希望我国不会回到马哈迪的时代。
假如时代进步，我国的言论自由却退步的话，我国其实就是退步。我希望执政者能有远见，因为我们已经活在一个“一按滑鼠即能看天下”的时代里了，没有人可拦阻人获得资讯。大马要在一个全球化竞争里脱颖而出的话，必须制造一个环境让外资对我们有信心，而言论自由是其一的必然要素。
共产主义国家的一言堂言论模式，导致人民贫困，生活缺乏素质。共产主义崩溃后，脱离的国家开始迈向民主及开放言论。不过，一个国家的进步，并不仅以经济和物资来衡量，还须看它的政府能够容许多大的言论空间。
马来西亚是一个自由世界的国家，但并不等于我们就能够享受很大自由。我们独立了51年，原本人民以为随着时代的进展，国家会变得越来越民主和言论会逐日获得进一步开放。可是事与愿违，我们可要失望了！这次内政部竟然吊销在野党的党报，即回教党的《哈拉卡》和公正党的《公正之声》。除此，行动党中文《火箭报》也面临准证不被内政部更新的问题。
其实从去年308大选的成绩，人民已经向国阵政府传达一个信息，即人民希望看到一个自由民主公平的国家出现，他们要摒弃一党独大的独裁政治环境。从这次吊销异议媒体的行动，可见巫统并没有捉到该信息。巫统仍然当家，这次事件在采取行动之前是否也获得成员党的认同吗？
吊销这些党报的行动，使到各平面和电子媒体增加重担。编辑们如履薄冰，在一个欠缺新闻自由的环境里，不少作者的文章被割爱并非他们写得滥，而是讲出事实。国家领袖被选民委托执政，不是要他们高坐在人民头上，而是服侍人民。要作明智爱民的政府就要听真话，而真话是从开放言论得来的。真话（忠言）逆耳，这是千古不变的道理。执政者行得好，自然能够无愧面对批判。
根据去年美国“自由之家”的数据，大马新闻自由排名第141位。全球总共有224个国家，194个属主权国家，加入联合国的有191个。若以191个联合国成员国来比较，第141位排名乃令人担忧的。我国经历了前首相马哈迪的独裁统治，人民希望我国不会回到马哈迪的时代。
假如时代进步，我国的言论自由却退步的话，我国其实就是退步。我希望执政者能有远见，因为我们已经活在一个“一按滑鼠即能看天下”的时代里了，没有人可拦阻人获得资讯。大马要在一个全球化竞争里脱颖而出的话，必须制造一个环境让外资对我们有信心，而言论自由是其一的必然要素。
Friday, March 20, 2009
US Endorses UN Declaration Homosexuality 美支持联合国同性恋
US Endorses UN Declaration Calling for De-Criminalizing Homosexuality
Source: http://news.iciba.com/a/20090319/548751.shtml
By David Gollust
State Department
18 March 2009
The Obama administration is reversing the position of its predecessor and is endorsing a U.N. General Assembly statement sponsored by France and the Netherlands condemning human rights violations based on sexual orientation or gender identity.
The statement, aimed at criminal penalties against homosexuality around the world, was signed by 66 U.N. member states when it came up for a vote in the assembly in December, including all member countries of the European Union and regional U.S. allies such as Japan, Australia and Israel. It was widely opposed by Muslim countries.
The Bush administration refused to sign the measure on grounds that it might commit the U.S. federal government to override laws by the individual states on issues such as discrimination by landlords or employers.
However, Acting State Department Spokesman Robert Wood told reporters that an interagency review by the Obama administration found that endorsing the U.N. declaration does not commit the U.S. federal government to legal obligations.
He said the United States is pleased to join other countries that have declared themselves against rights violations based on sexual orientation.
The United States is an outspoken defender of human rights and critic of human rights abuses around the world. As such, we join other supporters of this statement and we will continue to remind countries of the importance of respecting the human rights of all people in all appropriate international fora, Wood said.
Secretary of State Hillary Clinton said in Brussels earlier this month that human rights is one of the pillars of U.S. foreign policy, and that the new administration takes persecution and discrimination against gays and lesbians very seriously.
Nearly 60 countries, including members of the Organization of the Islamic Conference as well as Russia and China, oppose the U.N. declaration. A rival statement presented by Syria said protecting homosexuality could lead to social normalization and possibly legalization of deplorable acts, including pedophilia.
According to the sponsors of the anti-discrimination document, consensual same-sex relations are a criminal offense in more than 70 countries, and in several countries homosexual acts can be punishable by death.
美支持联合国呼吁同性恋合法化
2009年3月18日
美国星期三正式支持联合国呼吁将世界各地同性恋合法化的宣言。布什政府去年拒绝签署这个声明。
*事关人权*
奥巴马政府改变了上一届政府的立场，表示支持由法国及荷兰提出的联合国大会声明，谴责以性取向或性别认定为理由践踏人权的行为。
这份声明针对世界各地以刑事罪惩罚同性恋的做法，在去年12月表决时已经有66个联合国成员签署，包括所有欧盟成员国及美国的区域盟国例如日本、澳大利亚和以色列。穆斯林国家则普遍反对这项声明。
布什政府拒绝签署这个声明，理由是这样做可能使美国联邦政府必须在关于房东和雇主的歧视问题上推翻一些州的法律。
不过美国国务院代理发言人伍德告诉记者，奥巴马政府经过几个机构的联合审查以后认为支持联合国的宣示并不会使联邦政府承担法律上的义务。他说，美国很“乐于”加入其它宣布反对以性取向为理由践踏人权的国家的行列。
他说：“美国对于维护人权以及批评世界各地践踏人权行为一向直言不讳。正因为如此，我们加入了其它支持这个声明的国家的行列，而且我们将继续提醒其它国家在所有国际场合尊重所有人人权的重要性。”
*国务卿：人权是美国外交政策支柱之一*
美国国务卿希拉里·克林顿这个月早些时候在布鲁塞尔说，人权是美国外交政策的支柱之一，美国新政府严肃看待迫害及歧视同性恋问题。
*中国等多国反对*
将近60个国家，包括伊斯兰会议组织以及俄罗斯和中国都反对联合国的这个宣示。叙利亚针锋相对提出的声明说，保护同性恋可能导致让原本应该受到谴责的行为，包括恋童癖在内，被社会正常化和合法化。
联合国的这份反歧视同性恋声明说，在70多个国家里，双方同意的同性恋关系属于刑事犯罪，在几个国家里，同性恋行为可以被处以死刑。
Thursday, March 19, 2009
戲外的人生
Email received:
當你步入生命終點，不能走、不能講、不能想、不能吃喝，
只能靠呼吸器，就快閉眼長逝，
醫生告訴你，只剩最後一次機會，
只給你最後兩小時，回到你以前熟悉的世界，你最想做什麼？
至今看到那張照片：
闃黑的電影院，一個骨瘦如柴的癌末病人，
旁邊一個哭紅雙眼的女兒，和背後一群不斷拭淚的親友，總會一陣鼻酸。
他，在生命最後一刻，選擇包下戲院，陪一對兒女和癌症病童，看最後一場電影∼一
場悲傷的史瑞克。
那天上午，睡夢中被朋友的電話叫醒，她說，有個朋友末期癌症，快死了，中午包下
天母美麗華戲院，
陪家人看史瑞克第三集，親友互傳簡訊，希望大家作陪，去看他最後一眼。
我趕緊通知攝影，連忙換裝，從木柵搭計程車，花了四百多元飆到天母，見證這段不
朽的愛。
他，卅八歲，是自營廠牌的男裝業者，就在創業維艱，公司營業額好不容易突破一億
元，有天突然腹瀉不止，原本不以為意。
身高 一百八十公分 ，體重九十幾公斤的他，就像史瑞克一樣壯，健保卡只用過兩
次，
都是洗牙，從未生病，唯一例外是當兵時曾檢查Ｂ型肝炎帶原，但不曾有過異狀。
沒想到，到台大醫院檢查，醫師宣判，他已肝癌末期，最多只剩六個月生命，原來他
是因為癌細胞太大， 壓迫到胃才腹瀉不止。
這個青天霹靂，讓他一夜瘦了 三公斤 ，此後三天不吃、不說，神情呆滯，無法接受
上帝開他這個玩笑。
「我不偷不搶，認真過每一天，為何死神選上我？而不是那些壞人？」嬌小的太
太，更是傷悲。
事事依賴老公的她，就讀高職時，和讀五專的老公聯誼，姻緣線從此把們牽在一
起，認定彼此是今生廝守的那個人。
她等他退伍，成了他的新娘，婚後一兒一女相繼問世，夫妻倆聯手創立男裝公司，
就像童話故事， 一家四口從此過著幸福快樂的生活。
他愛孩子，堅持給他們最好的，讓他們念昂貴的私立小學，由於校車只到山下，
距離他們位半山腰的家還要走一段山路， 平時都由他跟太太輪流開車接送兒女；
寒暑假，會安排兒女到國外遊學，他暗自打算，大兒子若對服裝有興趣，
將來要送到義大利留學，繼承家業。
他不像一般商人，下班後幾乎從不喝酒應酬，都把時間留給家人，
假日常陪孩子看電影，超愛史瑞克的女兒尤其黏他，
一回到家，就像無尾熊般跳到爸爸身上，史瑞克前兩集一上映，就吵著要爸爸帶她去
看。
在她心中，高壯的爸爸就像史瑞克一樣可愛，說要爸爸抱她到一百歲。
這完美的一切，都因無情的癌症被打碎了。
醫生說，他的癌細胞太大了，化療無用，無法換肝，只能等死。
他捨不得拋下嬌妻幼子，不肯向死神束手投降，夫妻到對岸展開換肝之旅，從上
海、天津到廣州，終於如願換肝。無奈癌細胞不放過他，兩個月後又轉移到骨頭、脊
髓，再從肺臟一路蔓延到大腦，到最後已無法行動、言語， 一天平均要劇烈嘔吐廿
多次，只能打嗎啡止痛，靠打點滴維生。
戰到最後一兵一卒，去年端午節他決定轉到台北榮總安寧病房，打算有尊嚴地離開。
女兒有次到麥當勞吃速食，附贈一個史瑞克玩偶，回病房告訴爸爸，她想看史瑞克
三，他記在心裡，偷偷詢問主治大夫，他能否離開安寧病房陪兒女看最後一場電影。
醫生告訴他，依其身體狀況，頂多只能離開醫院四、五十分鐘，但為了完成他的心
願，醫生每天為他安排特訓，讓他試著將瘦到 四十公斤不到的孱弱身軀，從平躺的
病床移至輪椅，第一天五分鐘、第二天十分鐘、第三天廿分鐘...眾人努力讓他能陪
兒女看完一個半小時的史瑞克三。堅韌的愛，讓他辦到了。
他不想麻煩親友，臥病在床這兩年，偷偷躲起來和死神搏鬥，直到生命最後階段，他
才通知親友，希望見最後一面，感謝今生有緣相識。
那一天，中午十二點不到，大家接到他的簡訊，紛紛趕到戲院，醫院更是做好萬全準
備，由醫生、護士用擔架把他抬進戲院，架上點滴，蓋好棉被。
他勉強睜開雙眼，雖然說不出話，但看到親友、妻兒都在身邊，他很激動，淚水一直
在眼眶打轉；電影還沒開演，很多親友早已哭紅雙眼。
史瑞克上演以來，這絕對是笑聲最少的一場。
黑暗中，擔心的親友，眼光不時移向他。
其間他多次嘔吐，醫生趕緊打開手電筒幫他加藥，他的生命，如燈光閃爍飄搖，
大家很難專心觀影，生怕他就此斷氣。
電影結束時，史瑞克的老婆費歐娜生了三個小妖怪，又是一段新生命的開始。
但一落幕，看到奄奄一息的癌末爸爸，大家又不禁鼻酸落淚，上前為他們一家四口打
氣加油，小女兒已泣不成聲。
螢幕上的史瑞克，若看得見台下這家人，可能也會掉淚...。
我從未像這一天，那麼痛恨當記者！
因為我要強忍住淚水，向當事者問到更多故事，不能只是默默哀傷。這是多麼殘忍的
行業。
我也從未像這一天，覺得當記者，是如此幸福！
因為我有幸目睹至性至情的人生悲劇，能靠著我的筆，感動世人，喚起大家心中的
愛。
隨行年輕的攝影記者，應該也是天人交戰，但他有義務拍好這動人的一幕，昭告世
人，珍重健康，好好愛惜身邊的人。
我不想破壞現場氣氛，只用數位相機，隨著攝影拍了幾張照片，並未打擾這家人。
直到散場，我才趕到榮總，取得體諒，專訪癌末爸爸的另一半，聽她娓訴說一切。
「剛開始，女兒經常躲在棉被哭，問我怎麼辦，以後就要沒爸爸了。我告訴她，我也
同樣快失去老公了， 沒關係，還有媽媽在，以後我會陪妳躲在棉被裡哭。女兒於是
漸漸釋懷，找到堅強活下去的力量。」聽到這段話，我終於忍不住陪著她掉淚。
看著昔日合照健壯的丈夫，如今皮包骨，她心疼不已，告訴兒子「別人的蠟燭可以燒
十二小時，爸爸卻只燒六小時，是因為他燒太快、太亮了！你將來一定要獨立，像爸
爸一樣，每天都過得很充實、負責，這才是生命。」
傍晚，搭捷運回去，到寫稿，我眼淚一直流個不停。
隔天，他的照片登上頭版，感動了很多人；至今想起當天情景，我還是很想掉淚。
一周後，他安然離去，臨終前一再對老婆說「對不起」，並引用電視上一對夫妻在雨
天共乘遊覽車出遊的保險廣告：「如果可以，我也寧願與妳白頭偕老，然後讓妳先
走，悲傷由我來背，無奈...。」
史瑞克三DVD上架有一陣子了，每次到出租店，我都猶豫要不要租回家。
去年暑假，在電影院看過史瑞克三，但完全不記得情節，連可愛的小史瑞克長什麼
樣，都沒印象了。
因為戲外的人生，比戲內動人；戲內上演喜劇，戲外卻是悲劇，但這悲劇，卻又蘊藏
無比生命力。
「他是天上的月亮，同時照亮了我們每一盆生命之水！」
那天電影開場前，主治醫師致詞說的話，我永遠記得。
(Embedded image moved to file: pic05607.jpg)
人生吧，
0歲出場，10歲快樂成長；
20為情彷徨；30基本定向； 40拼命打闖；
50回頭望望；60告老還鄉； 70搓搓麻將；
80曬曬太陽；90躺在床上；100掛在牆上...
生的偉大，死得淒涼！
能牽手的時候，請別只是肩並肩，
能擁抱的時候，請別只是手牽手，
能在一起的時候，請別輕易分開！
當大部分人都在關注你飛得高不高時，
只有少部分人關心你飛得累不累--
這就是友情，再忙也要照顧好自己，
朋友雖不常聯繫卻一直惦念！
2009新概念
一個中心： 一切以健康為中心。
兩個基本點：遇事瀟灑一點，看事糊塗一點。
三個忘記： 忘記年齡，忘記過去，忘記恩怨。
四個擁有： 無論你有多弱或多強，一定要擁有真正愛你的人，
擁有知心朋友，擁有向 上的事業，擁有溫暖的住所。
五個要： 要唱，要跳，要俏，要笑，要苗條。
六個不能： 不能餓了纔吃，不能渴了纔喝，不能困了纔睡，
不能累了纔歇，不能病了 纔檢查，不能老了再後悔!
當你步入生命終點，不能走、不能講、不能想、不能吃喝，
只能靠呼吸器，就快閉眼長逝，
醫生告訴你，只剩最後一次機會，
只給你最後兩小時，回到你以前熟悉的世界，你最想做什麼？
至今看到那張照片：
闃黑的電影院，一個骨瘦如柴的癌末病人，
旁邊一個哭紅雙眼的女兒，和背後一群不斷拭淚的親友，總會一陣鼻酸。
他，在生命最後一刻，選擇包下戲院，陪一對兒女和癌症病童，看最後一場電影∼一
場悲傷的史瑞克。
那天上午，睡夢中被朋友的電話叫醒，她說，有個朋友末期癌症，快死了，中午包下
天母美麗華戲院，
陪家人看史瑞克第三集，親友互傳簡訊，希望大家作陪，去看他最後一眼。
我趕緊通知攝影，連忙換裝，從木柵搭計程車，花了四百多元飆到天母，見證這段不
朽的愛。
他，卅八歲，是自營廠牌的男裝業者，就在創業維艱，公司營業額好不容易突破一億
元，有天突然腹瀉不止，原本不以為意。
身高 一百八十公分 ，體重九十幾公斤的他，就像史瑞克一樣壯，健保卡只用過兩
次，
都是洗牙，從未生病，唯一例外是當兵時曾檢查Ｂ型肝炎帶原，但不曾有過異狀。
沒想到，到台大醫院檢查，醫師宣判，他已肝癌末期，最多只剩六個月生命，原來他
是因為癌細胞太大， 壓迫到胃才腹瀉不止。
這個青天霹靂，讓他一夜瘦了 三公斤 ，此後三天不吃、不說，神情呆滯，無法接受
上帝開他這個玩笑。
「我不偷不搶，認真過每一天，為何死神選上我？而不是那些壞人？」嬌小的太
太，更是傷悲。
事事依賴老公的她，就讀高職時，和讀五專的老公聯誼，姻緣線從此把們牽在一
起，認定彼此是今生廝守的那個人。
她等他退伍，成了他的新娘，婚後一兒一女相繼問世，夫妻倆聯手創立男裝公司，
就像童話故事， 一家四口從此過著幸福快樂的生活。
他愛孩子，堅持給他們最好的，讓他們念昂貴的私立小學，由於校車只到山下，
距離他們位半山腰的家還要走一段山路， 平時都由他跟太太輪流開車接送兒女；
寒暑假，會安排兒女到國外遊學，他暗自打算，大兒子若對服裝有興趣，
將來要送到義大利留學，繼承家業。
他不像一般商人，下班後幾乎從不喝酒應酬，都把時間留給家人，
假日常陪孩子看電影，超愛史瑞克的女兒尤其黏他，
一回到家，就像無尾熊般跳到爸爸身上，史瑞克前兩集一上映，就吵著要爸爸帶她去
看。
在她心中，高壯的爸爸就像史瑞克一樣可愛，說要爸爸抱她到一百歲。
這完美的一切，都因無情的癌症被打碎了。
醫生說，他的癌細胞太大了，化療無用，無法換肝，只能等死。
他捨不得拋下嬌妻幼子，不肯向死神束手投降，夫妻到對岸展開換肝之旅，從上
海、天津到廣州，終於如願換肝。無奈癌細胞不放過他，兩個月後又轉移到骨頭、脊
髓，再從肺臟一路蔓延到大腦，到最後已無法行動、言語， 一天平均要劇烈嘔吐廿
多次，只能打嗎啡止痛，靠打點滴維生。
戰到最後一兵一卒，去年端午節他決定轉到台北榮總安寧病房，打算有尊嚴地離開。
女兒有次到麥當勞吃速食，附贈一個史瑞克玩偶，回病房告訴爸爸，她想看史瑞克
三，他記在心裡，偷偷詢問主治大夫，他能否離開安寧病房陪兒女看最後一場電影。
醫生告訴他，依其身體狀況，頂多只能離開醫院四、五十分鐘，但為了完成他的心
願，醫生每天為他安排特訓，讓他試著將瘦到 四十公斤不到的孱弱身軀，從平躺的
病床移至輪椅，第一天五分鐘、第二天十分鐘、第三天廿分鐘...眾人努力讓他能陪
兒女看完一個半小時的史瑞克三。堅韌的愛，讓他辦到了。
他不想麻煩親友，臥病在床這兩年，偷偷躲起來和死神搏鬥，直到生命最後階段，他
才通知親友，希望見最後一面，感謝今生有緣相識。
那一天，中午十二點不到，大家接到他的簡訊，紛紛趕到戲院，醫院更是做好萬全準
備，由醫生、護士用擔架把他抬進戲院，架上點滴，蓋好棉被。
他勉強睜開雙眼，雖然說不出話，但看到親友、妻兒都在身邊，他很激動，淚水一直
在眼眶打轉；電影還沒開演，很多親友早已哭紅雙眼。
史瑞克上演以來，這絕對是笑聲最少的一場。
黑暗中，擔心的親友，眼光不時移向他。
其間他多次嘔吐，醫生趕緊打開手電筒幫他加藥，他的生命，如燈光閃爍飄搖，
大家很難專心觀影，生怕他就此斷氣。
電影結束時，史瑞克的老婆費歐娜生了三個小妖怪，又是一段新生命的開始。
但一落幕，看到奄奄一息的癌末爸爸，大家又不禁鼻酸落淚，上前為他們一家四口打
氣加油，小女兒已泣不成聲。
螢幕上的史瑞克，若看得見台下這家人，可能也會掉淚...。
我從未像這一天，那麼痛恨當記者！
因為我要強忍住淚水，向當事者問到更多故事，不能只是默默哀傷。這是多麼殘忍的
行業。
我也從未像這一天，覺得當記者，是如此幸福！
因為我有幸目睹至性至情的人生悲劇，能靠著我的筆，感動世人，喚起大家心中的
愛。
隨行年輕的攝影記者，應該也是天人交戰，但他有義務拍好這動人的一幕，昭告世
人，珍重健康，好好愛惜身邊的人。
我不想破壞現場氣氛，只用數位相機，隨著攝影拍了幾張照片，並未打擾這家人。
直到散場，我才趕到榮總，取得體諒，專訪癌末爸爸的另一半，聽她娓訴說一切。
「剛開始，女兒經常躲在棉被哭，問我怎麼辦，以後就要沒爸爸了。我告訴她，我也
同樣快失去老公了， 沒關係，還有媽媽在，以後我會陪妳躲在棉被裡哭。女兒於是
漸漸釋懷，找到堅強活下去的力量。」聽到這段話，我終於忍不住陪著她掉淚。
看著昔日合照健壯的丈夫，如今皮包骨，她心疼不已，告訴兒子「別人的蠟燭可以燒
十二小時，爸爸卻只燒六小時，是因為他燒太快、太亮了！你將來一定要獨立，像爸
爸一樣，每天都過得很充實、負責，這才是生命。」
傍晚，搭捷運回去，到寫稿，我眼淚一直流個不停。
隔天，他的照片登上頭版，感動了很多人；至今想起當天情景，我還是很想掉淚。
一周後，他安然離去，臨終前一再對老婆說「對不起」，並引用電視上一對夫妻在雨
天共乘遊覽車出遊的保險廣告：「如果可以，我也寧願與妳白頭偕老，然後讓妳先
走，悲傷由我來背，無奈...。」
史瑞克三DVD上架有一陣子了，每次到出租店，我都猶豫要不要租回家。
去年暑假，在電影院看過史瑞克三，但完全不記得情節，連可愛的小史瑞克長什麼
樣，都沒印象了。
因為戲外的人生，比戲內動人；戲內上演喜劇，戲外卻是悲劇，但這悲劇，卻又蘊藏
無比生命力。
「他是天上的月亮，同時照亮了我們每一盆生命之水！」
那天電影開場前，主治醫師致詞說的話，我永遠記得。
(Embedded image moved to file: pic05607.jpg)
人生吧，
0歲出場，10歲快樂成長；
20為情彷徨；30基本定向； 40拼命打闖；
50回頭望望；60告老還鄉； 70搓搓麻將；
80曬曬太陽；90躺在床上；100掛在牆上...
生的偉大，死得淒涼！
能牽手的時候，請別只是肩並肩，
能擁抱的時候，請別只是手牽手，
能在一起的時候，請別輕易分開！
當大部分人都在關注你飛得高不高時，
只有少部分人關心你飛得累不累--
這就是友情，再忙也要照顧好自己，
朋友雖不常聯繫卻一直惦念！
2009新概念
一個中心： 一切以健康為中心。
兩個基本點：遇事瀟灑一點，看事糊塗一點。
三個忘記： 忘記年齡，忘記過去，忘記恩怨。
四個擁有： 無論你有多弱或多強，一定要擁有真正愛你的人，
擁有知心朋友，擁有向 上的事業，擁有溫暖的住所。
五個要： 要唱，要跳，要俏，要笑，要苗條。
六個不能： 不能餓了纔吃，不能渴了纔喝，不能困了纔睡，
不能累了纔歇，不能病了 纔檢查，不能老了再後悔!
No More Monkey Business in the Ministry
Mar 18, 2009
In this day of compromise, we must restate the obvious: God requires leaders to play by the rules.
Almost two years ago a dynamic preacher from a growing church in the Southeast was caught in adultery. His distraught wife talked with the "other woman," an exotic dancer from another country, and shared Christ with her. Meanwhile a small group of pastors "covered" the situation and hurriedly sent the embarrassed pastor to a few weeks of counseling. In the end, the pastor and his wife divorced and members of the congregation who didn't have all the facts blamed her for the breakup.
Today this pastor is still in the pulpit—although his preaching has a hollow tone. Some members of the church left when they learned of the pastor's unfaithfulness. Yet many others stayed because they felt they shouldn't judge the pastor for his sin.
"As painful as it is to remove a gifted leader from his or her position, it must be done to preserve the fear of the Lord."
This situation has been repeated over and over in recent years. Jamal Harrison-Bryant, pastor of the 10,000-member Empowerment Temple in Baltimore, was accused of fathering a child out of wedlock. His wife, Gizelle, citing adultery and cruel treatment, filed for divorce in 2008. Yet Bryant preached a now-famous sermon in the church in which he used King David's story of adultery with Bathsheba to defend himself.
"I am still the man!" he shouted from the pulpit as worshippers stood and cheered. "The anointing on my life is greater than any mistake." He made it clear that he had no intention of being defrocked or disciplined. To Bryant, anointing surpasses character.
All this moral failure among leaders today has average Christians confused. Is there ever a time when leaders are disqualified? Is restoration always immediate? Are we acting like Pharisees if we demand that leaders sit on the bench for a while to recover from their mistakes and prove their character again? It is time for us to restate some obvious rules:
1. There are definite qualifications for Christian leadership. The apostle Paul made it clear that there is a litmus test for leaders in the New Testament church. In 1 Timothy 3:2-7 he says a leader must be (1) above reproach; (2) the husband of one wife; (3) temperate (not an abuser of alcohol or other substances); (4) prudent; (5) respectable; (6) hospitable; (7) able to teach; (8) a good manager of his own family; (9) respected in the community; and (10) not a new convert.
In his letter to Titus, Paul offers a similar list and adds further qualifications, including (11) not self-willed; (12) not pugnacious; and (3) not fond of sordid gain.
Notice that only one of these qualifications ("able to teach") involves anointing. Paul says nothing about a leader's ability to prophesy, heal the sick, see visions, talk to angels, raise funds, sing, shout or make audiences swoon. Neither does he require certain academic credentials. Character is the key.
Many scholars agree that "husband of one wife" was a New Testament-era way of saying "he must be a one-woman man." In other words, he cannot be an adulterer. (Nor can he be polygamous.) Leaders must walk in sexual purity. They must adhere to the biblical definition of marriage and stay faithful in that context.
2. Those who do not meet these qualifications must step down. If Paul demanded character of his leaders, it stands to reason that those who fail in any of these areas should be removed from office—at least until they regain the character quality after a time of rehabilitation. When leaders failed, Paul also recommended that they be strongly rebuked "in the presence of all, so that the rest also will be fearful of sinning" (1 Tim. 5:20, NASB). Their sin was never to be minimized, excused or swept under a rug.
This strict approach was not optional—and Paul warned Timothy about the temptation to be partial. He told him: "Maintain these principles without bias" (v. 21). Biblical discipline cannot be sloppy. We can't remove one guy for adultery and then offer kid-glove treatment to another guy just because he is our friend. As painful as it is to remove a gifted leader from his or her position, it must be done to preserve the fear of the Lord.
3. The church will not thrive if discipline of leaders is neglected. Paul sternly warned Timothy about ordaining any church leader prematurely. He wrote: "Do not lay hands upon anyone too hastily and thereby share responsibility for the sins of others" (1 Tim. 5:22). In other words, leaders actually incur a strict judgment from God if they ordain a leader who does not meet biblical qualifications. If ordaining unapproved leaders becomes a habit, corruption will take root in the church and we will eventually face God's corrective judgment.
The Corinthian church was warned that the deceitfulness of sin would infect them all if they did not deal with the immorality in their midst (see 1 Cor. 5:7-13). John told the church in Thyatira that they would lose their influence because they tolerated false teaching that led to immorality (Rev. 2:20). Sin has sobering consequences.
We can't rewrite the rules. I pray that leaders in the independent sector of the church today will stop the monkey business and restore biblical order.
J. Lee Grady is editor of Charisma.
In this day of compromise, we must restate the obvious: God requires leaders to play by the rules.
Almost two years ago a dynamic preacher from a growing church in the Southeast was caught in adultery. His distraught wife talked with the "other woman," an exotic dancer from another country, and shared Christ with her. Meanwhile a small group of pastors "covered" the situation and hurriedly sent the embarrassed pastor to a few weeks of counseling. In the end, the pastor and his wife divorced and members of the congregation who didn't have all the facts blamed her for the breakup.
Today this pastor is still in the pulpit—although his preaching has a hollow tone. Some members of the church left when they learned of the pastor's unfaithfulness. Yet many others stayed because they felt they shouldn't judge the pastor for his sin.
"As painful as it is to remove a gifted leader from his or her position, it must be done to preserve the fear of the Lord."
This situation has been repeated over and over in recent years. Jamal Harrison-Bryant, pastor of the 10,000-member Empowerment Temple in Baltimore, was accused of fathering a child out of wedlock. His wife, Gizelle, citing adultery and cruel treatment, filed for divorce in 2008. Yet Bryant preached a now-famous sermon in the church in which he used King David's story of adultery with Bathsheba to defend himself.
"I am still the man!" he shouted from the pulpit as worshippers stood and cheered. "The anointing on my life is greater than any mistake." He made it clear that he had no intention of being defrocked or disciplined. To Bryant, anointing surpasses character.
All this moral failure among leaders today has average Christians confused. Is there ever a time when leaders are disqualified? Is restoration always immediate? Are we acting like Pharisees if we demand that leaders sit on the bench for a while to recover from their mistakes and prove their character again? It is time for us to restate some obvious rules:
1. There are definite qualifications for Christian leadership. The apostle Paul made it clear that there is a litmus test for leaders in the New Testament church. In 1 Timothy 3:2-7 he says a leader must be (1) above reproach; (2) the husband of one wife; (3) temperate (not an abuser of alcohol or other substances); (4) prudent; (5) respectable; (6) hospitable; (7) able to teach; (8) a good manager of his own family; (9) respected in the community; and (10) not a new convert.
In his letter to Titus, Paul offers a similar list and adds further qualifications, including (11) not self-willed; (12) not pugnacious; and (3) not fond of sordid gain.
Notice that only one of these qualifications ("able to teach") involves anointing. Paul says nothing about a leader's ability to prophesy, heal the sick, see visions, talk to angels, raise funds, sing, shout or make audiences swoon. Neither does he require certain academic credentials. Character is the key.
Many scholars agree that "husband of one wife" was a New Testament-era way of saying "he must be a one-woman man." In other words, he cannot be an adulterer. (Nor can he be polygamous.) Leaders must walk in sexual purity. They must adhere to the biblical definition of marriage and stay faithful in that context.
2. Those who do not meet these qualifications must step down. If Paul demanded character of his leaders, it stands to reason that those who fail in any of these areas should be removed from office—at least until they regain the character quality after a time of rehabilitation. When leaders failed, Paul also recommended that they be strongly rebuked "in the presence of all, so that the rest also will be fearful of sinning" (1 Tim. 5:20, NASB). Their sin was never to be minimized, excused or swept under a rug.
This strict approach was not optional—and Paul warned Timothy about the temptation to be partial. He told him: "Maintain these principles without bias" (v. 21). Biblical discipline cannot be sloppy. We can't remove one guy for adultery and then offer kid-glove treatment to another guy just because he is our friend. As painful as it is to remove a gifted leader from his or her position, it must be done to preserve the fear of the Lord.
3. The church will not thrive if discipline of leaders is neglected. Paul sternly warned Timothy about ordaining any church leader prematurely. He wrote: "Do not lay hands upon anyone too hastily and thereby share responsibility for the sins of others" (1 Tim. 5:22). In other words, leaders actually incur a strict judgment from God if they ordain a leader who does not meet biblical qualifications. If ordaining unapproved leaders becomes a habit, corruption will take root in the church and we will eventually face God's corrective judgment.
The Corinthian church was warned that the deceitfulness of sin would infect them all if they did not deal with the immorality in their midst (see 1 Cor. 5:7-13). John told the church in Thyatira that they would lose their influence because they tolerated false teaching that led to immorality (Rev. 2:20). Sin has sobering consequences.
We can't rewrite the rules. I pray that leaders in the independent sector of the church today will stop the monkey business and restore biblical order.
J. Lee Grady is editor of Charisma.
Thursday, March 12, 2009
The Tragic Scandal of Greasy Grace
March 12，2009
This week's announcement about evangelist Todd Bentley's hasty remarriage and restoration is sending a confusing message to the church.
I groaned when I learned early this week that Canadian preacher Todd Bentley, leader of the controversial Lakeland Revival, had decided to divorce his wife, Shonnah, and marry his former ministry intern, Jessa Hasbrook. The news surfaced after almost nine months of silence and speculation, during which time the board of Bentley's Fresh Fire Ministries in British Columbia publicly scolded him for committing adultery.
In a statement released March 10 by Rick Joyner, the popular author and minister who is overseeing Bentley's restoration process, we were told that (1) Bentley married his new wife several weeks ago and moved to Joyner's base in Fort Mill, S.C.; (2) Todd and Jessa agree that their relationship was "wrong and premature" and that it "should not have happened the way it did"; (3) Bentley will remain out of public ministry while he seeks healing; and (4) Joyner will oversee the healing process with input from Dallas pastor Jack Deere and California pastor Bill Johnson.
"Many of us have rejected biblical discipline and adopted a sweet, spineless love that cannot correct."
It was also announced that Bentley plans to relaunch his ministry, called Fresh Fire USA, in Fort Mill, and that Joyner is now collecting donations from supporters to help rebuild it. (The Canadian ministry Bentley started has now been renamed Transform International, and it has severed ties with the evangelist.)
In a few places in his statement Joyner expressed tough love, especially when he said: "We know that trust has to be earned and that Todd will have to earn the trust of the body of Christ for future ministry, which will not be easy, nor should it be." He also made it clear that true repentance and restoration "can only come if we refuse to compromise the clear biblical standards for morality and integrity."
But there were some glaring omissions in the statements released this week that indicate a fundamental weakness in our freestyle approach to "restoring" fallen leaders.
First of all, it is outrageous that Shonnah Bentley, Todd's first wife, does not seem to be an issue in the current discussion. Her name is never mentioned in Joyner's statement—while Todd is mentioned 18 times. We are never told how Shonnah is handling the divorce. How will she manage to care for the three children she and Todd share? She and the kids seem invisible in this process. Yet if anyone needs healing and restoration, is it not the other half of this broken family?
Second, we charismatics still seem to have a habit of elevating gifting above character. It's almost as if the end justifies the means. (So what if a preacher ruins one marriage and makes a hasty decision to marry a younger woman—the important thing is that we get him back in the pulpit to heal the sick!) That is a perversion of biblical integrity. God can anoint any man or woman with the Holy Spirit's power; what He is looking for are vessels of honor that can carry that anointing with dignity, humility and purity.
What is most deplorable about this latest installment in the Bentley scandal is the lack of true remorse. In his own statement, Bentley apologizes for his actions and says he "takes full responsibility for my part for the ending of the marriage." But how can he be taking "full responsibility" if he willingly chose to have a girlfriend on the side—and then married her immediately after his divorce was final? Why did he hide for several months when he should have been listening to counsel and seeking reconciliation with his first wife?
Many Christians today have rejected biblical discipline and adopted a sweet, spineless love that cannot correct. Our grace is greasy. No matter what an offending brother does, we stroke him and pet him and nurse his wounds while we ignore the people he wounded. No matter how heinous his sin, we offer comforting platitudes because, after all, who are we to judge?
When the apostle Paul learned that a member of the Corinthian church was in an immoral relationship with his father's wife, he did not rush to comfort the man. He told the Corinthians: "You have become arrogant and have not mourned instead, so that the one who had done this deed would be removed from your midst" (I Cor. 5:2). Sometimes we must draw a ruthless sword in order to bring genuine healing. The "wounds of a friend" are faithful to bring conviction and true repentance (see Prov. 27:6).
Paul actually delivered the unrepentant Corinthian man to Satan "for the destruction of his flesh" (5:5) so that he could be saved. That does not sound very nice. Many today would call Paul's tactic harsh and legalistic. But that is because we have lost any true sense of the fear of the Lord—and we don't realize that our laxness about God's standards is a perversion of His mercy. When the sin is severe, the public rebuke must be severe.
In all the discussion of Bentley and the demise of the Lakeland Revival, I am waiting to hear the sound of sackcloth ripping into shreds. We should be weeping. We should be rending our hearts—as God commanded Israel when they fell into sin (see Joel 2: 13-14). To give guidance to a confused church, our leaders should have publicly decried the Lakeland disaster while at the same time helping both Todd and Shonnah to heal.
We have not mourned this travesty. We have not been shocked and appalled that such sin has been named among us. We act as if flippant divorce and remarriage are minor infractions—when in actuality they are such serious moral failures that they can bring disqualification.
If we truly love Todd Bentley, we will not clamor for his quick return to the pulpit. While we certainly want him to be fully restored to fellowship with God, we cannot rush the process of restoring a man to ministry. Leaders must live up to a higher standard. We must demand that those involved in Bentley's restoration not only love him but also love the church by protecting us from the kind of scandal we endured last year.
J. Lee Grady is editor of Charisma.
This week's announcement about evangelist Todd Bentley's hasty remarriage and restoration is sending a confusing message to the church.
I groaned when I learned early this week that Canadian preacher Todd Bentley, leader of the controversial Lakeland Revival, had decided to divorce his wife, Shonnah, and marry his former ministry intern, Jessa Hasbrook. The news surfaced after almost nine months of silence and speculation, during which time the board of Bentley's Fresh Fire Ministries in British Columbia publicly scolded him for committing adultery.
In a statement released March 10 by Rick Joyner, the popular author and minister who is overseeing Bentley's restoration process, we were told that (1) Bentley married his new wife several weeks ago and moved to Joyner's base in Fort Mill, S.C.; (2) Todd and Jessa agree that their relationship was "wrong and premature" and that it "should not have happened the way it did"; (3) Bentley will remain out of public ministry while he seeks healing; and (4) Joyner will oversee the healing process with input from Dallas pastor Jack Deere and California pastor Bill Johnson.
"Many of us have rejected biblical discipline and adopted a sweet, spineless love that cannot correct."
It was also announced that Bentley plans to relaunch his ministry, called Fresh Fire USA, in Fort Mill, and that Joyner is now collecting donations from supporters to help rebuild it. (The Canadian ministry Bentley started has now been renamed Transform International, and it has severed ties with the evangelist.)
In a few places in his statement Joyner expressed tough love, especially when he said: "We know that trust has to be earned and that Todd will have to earn the trust of the body of Christ for future ministry, which will not be easy, nor should it be." He also made it clear that true repentance and restoration "can only come if we refuse to compromise the clear biblical standards for morality and integrity."
But there were some glaring omissions in the statements released this week that indicate a fundamental weakness in our freestyle approach to "restoring" fallen leaders.
First of all, it is outrageous that Shonnah Bentley, Todd's first wife, does not seem to be an issue in the current discussion. Her name is never mentioned in Joyner's statement—while Todd is mentioned 18 times. We are never told how Shonnah is handling the divorce. How will she manage to care for the three children she and Todd share? She and the kids seem invisible in this process. Yet if anyone needs healing and restoration, is it not the other half of this broken family?
Second, we charismatics still seem to have a habit of elevating gifting above character. It's almost as if the end justifies the means. (So what if a preacher ruins one marriage and makes a hasty decision to marry a younger woman—the important thing is that we get him back in the pulpit to heal the sick!) That is a perversion of biblical integrity. God can anoint any man or woman with the Holy Spirit's power; what He is looking for are vessels of honor that can carry that anointing with dignity, humility and purity.
What is most deplorable about this latest installment in the Bentley scandal is the lack of true remorse. In his own statement, Bentley apologizes for his actions and says he "takes full responsibility for my part for the ending of the marriage." But how can he be taking "full responsibility" if he willingly chose to have a girlfriend on the side—and then married her immediately after his divorce was final? Why did he hide for several months when he should have been listening to counsel and seeking reconciliation with his first wife?
Many Christians today have rejected biblical discipline and adopted a sweet, spineless love that cannot correct. Our grace is greasy. No matter what an offending brother does, we stroke him and pet him and nurse his wounds while we ignore the people he wounded. No matter how heinous his sin, we offer comforting platitudes because, after all, who are we to judge?
When the apostle Paul learned that a member of the Corinthian church was in an immoral relationship with his father's wife, he did not rush to comfort the man. He told the Corinthians: "You have become arrogant and have not mourned instead, so that the one who had done this deed would be removed from your midst" (I Cor. 5:2). Sometimes we must draw a ruthless sword in order to bring genuine healing. The "wounds of a friend" are faithful to bring conviction and true repentance (see Prov. 27:6).
Paul actually delivered the unrepentant Corinthian man to Satan "for the destruction of his flesh" (5:5) so that he could be saved. That does not sound very nice. Many today would call Paul's tactic harsh and legalistic. But that is because we have lost any true sense of the fear of the Lord—and we don't realize that our laxness about God's standards is a perversion of His mercy. When the sin is severe, the public rebuke must be severe.
In all the discussion of Bentley and the demise of the Lakeland Revival, I am waiting to hear the sound of sackcloth ripping into shreds. We should be weeping. We should be rending our hearts—as God commanded Israel when they fell into sin (see Joel 2: 13-14). To give guidance to a confused church, our leaders should have publicly decried the Lakeland disaster while at the same time helping both Todd and Shonnah to heal.
We have not mourned this travesty. We have not been shocked and appalled that such sin has been named among us. We act as if flippant divorce and remarriage are minor infractions—when in actuality they are such serious moral failures that they can bring disqualification.
If we truly love Todd Bentley, we will not clamor for his quick return to the pulpit. While we certainly want him to be fully restored to fellowship with God, we cannot rush the process of restoring a man to ministry. Leaders must live up to a higher standard. We must demand that those involved in Bentley's restoration not only love him but also love the church by protecting us from the kind of scandal we endured last year.
J. Lee Grady is editor of Charisma.
Wednesday, March 4, 2009
China trip
March 2 went to LCCT and 8.10 a.m flew off to Hangzhou. At 1.10 p.m. reached Xiaoshan International Airport. It was just a small airport.
The lady custom officer greeted me with a smile and friendly wishes. When it was done, I gave her a "very satisfied" rating on the machine displayed.
It was raining. Jiang was waiting for me. We waited till 2.40 p.m for a bus to Shaoxing. It was cold, about 7 degrees C. Miraculously God kept me warm as I only put on a thin long sleeve shirt and a coat.
We put up at Hua Yuan Hotel. Three HK brothers were there too.
I needed more clothing. I brought only little clothing.
The lady custom officer greeted me with a smile and friendly wishes. When it was done, I gave her a "very satisfied" rating on the machine displayed.
It was raining. Jiang was waiting for me. We waited till 2.40 p.m for a bus to Shaoxing. It was cold, about 7 degrees C. Miraculously God kept me warm as I only put on a thin long sleeve shirt and a coat.
We put up at Hua Yuan Hotel. Three HK brothers were there too.
I needed more clothing. I brought only little clothing.
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